40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I'm thinking of being single again and become a player instead of committed, but I'm worried that I will get lonely when I grow old and cannot fuck anymore. How do you deal with this issue? Will it be lonely? Or the freedom is great?

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Ppl always think that when u get married you will step in the tomb, but I do not think this way.

What the point of fucking all the gals world wide? You don't received any medal "best bonking player"

Find a good gal and marry, give each other a freedom. Your parent are waiting for this day to arrive。 创忠接代。 Hopefully the 1st word is correct haha

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I agree with you..no medal no nothing. If she is the one for you, why let her go? People say bcos of one tree let go the whole forest...kinda crap. If she put in effort in all little details for you..the answer is there already.

I have a childhood friend, is a ultimate chiongster..everywhere anytime can find girls to bonk..but settled down get married last year and now planning for 2nd home and baby liao.

Don't live in regrets bro..all the best.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Only one life, live for self or for parents?? Someone who likes food will want to try many food, someone who likes sex will want to fuck many girls...

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

But if there is no parent will you been in this world? Since you already know what you want then what the point of this thread?

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

there is too much girl to fuck if you just focus on the sex part , and there is no possible for us to chieong forever , we will need to eventually settle down .
I think it feel more better when you win the one you love than you spent $$$ fucking the hottest girl

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

There is a difference between , " Fucking all the girls of the world" and getting married.

Fucking is all about lust...pleasure...new experiences... enjoyment.....

Getting married is about emotions, companionship , living together and experiencing life up and down as the life keep going without stopping, aging together etc....

When you get confused and think both they are one and the same , people often make disastrous decisions.

You got to ask yourself . What do you want and go for both or only the one you want.

Once you can differentiate them and have a clear mind, you can them make a good decision for different needs .

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Then let me tell you our story...

http://www.reddit.com/r/relationship...rting_her_29f/

Let me know if you insist that I should marry or give up, after you have read this.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I'm not saying i'm not thankful to them, but just be honest it was never my decision to be brought into this world. I still love my parents but how I live my life is still my choice.

Problem is, I love her, but we're almost totally not sexually compatible. And I don't want to cheat. How?

I'm not confuse between the two paths. That's why I'm in a dilemma because I don't want to marry and regret it, nor do I want to break up and regret it.

I have high sex drive and she almost has none. I don't blame her, but how can I solve this issue without cheating??

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Bro, your gf can be a good wife in future, you should get marry, I understand that the issue is because of 1 party high sex drive and 1 party low sex drive, what I can think of is try to talk to her about it and hope she understand, un-slash out her potential.

You better marry a gal who is low drive then a high drive, if is high drive in future if you can feed her well she will go out find guy.

Base on the story, marry her and think about it, but worst to worst the last solution is to eat outside which I don't recommend.

Gd luck

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

If I were you, I would break up with the girl...marriage is not about just finding a nice girl and settling down with her...it is about finding the woman whom you see yourself spending the rest of your life with her and vice versa.....never settle for anything less.....:D:D:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

..is 传宗, not 传种or 创忠 ok

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I read a bit of your story... The gist is in your question above right?
If u see marriage as just sex, then don't marry bah.
Go find many piaks until u song song, maybe years later you will be ready for marriage... Provided you still can find a partner to marry then.

Fast forward many years...
My friend de friend de friend... Bachelor... Retired... Always go find piaks piaks last time... Parents no longer around... lives alone... Nowadays sexlife low liao... Always look for my friend/khakis for dinner or go casino.

:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I thought you have wifi Liao? :eek:

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I agree with what u said. She can be a good wife. This morning while she's preparing to go to work I just sat down and looked at her. She looks so beautiful to me I thought "I love her. I love this girl" then she saw me and said "oi...crazy ah? See what?" Hahaha she's so cute.

Thanks for sharing. For me I never agree that marriage is just about sex, just like life is not about money. But with enough sex it makes the marriage wonderful don't you think?

I think before marriage I will have a serious sit down discussion with her, on both our expectations toward each other. Of course we love each other but love is not just a saying but it is comprised of many things that make it work. Household management, respect, caring, honesty, communication, and many things. Sex is also one of it. Sex is physical and intimate, the only factor that differentiates a friendly love with a marriage love. Without good sex life how can one says that a marriage is successful??

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Told u it's my friend de friend de friend liao...
I got many friends.
I friend u ok?

:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

If u really considering marriage... Go for marriage counseling bah.
Otherwise it's only your POV vs her POV.
Gets you no where.
Both of you may see the real problem from a 3rd party's POV.
:cool:

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

one question
whats the use of pussy if u can't fxxk
you can always buy drinks for your buddies if you are lonely

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I am not in that age range but I do know one thing:

All relationships need nurturing.


Turning player or what is just a choice. Please do not confuse yourself.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

We have been 8 years in a relationship and 4 years of it closely together. We will only be 20s once, 30s once... like Wayne Lai said "人生有多少个十年"?

After the years are gone, do you think I can say "hey, this is not working, let's turn back the clock to 10 years back and try another path"

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

You also tio the YOLO syndrome ah?
Life choices are never simple.
There is no user guide to a perfect marriage.

Even if everyone vote-who-they-say-they-will-vote come year 2016...
Will FTs be lesser?
Will inflation be lower?
Will sex be better?

:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I thought you have more enemies than friends? :eek:

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

You must be a good guy and that why your gal is together with for 8 years. Try sit down with her and talk to her your problem. Every problem can be sort out.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Was just watching "Ender's Game" yst... got this quote... SMLJ
Whatever it means... lol
:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

I read your story and your predicaments.

All the below applies only if you TRULY LOVE your woman.

I can share with you what I have learned over the years :

It is rare or near impossible to find someone who will be compatible with you in all ways , so what you have to do is prioritize what is important to you to the least important . The problem with this is is that priorities change over time as you grow older so you have to be careful in making your decision.

These are the good points about her :

1) Based on your story, it seems she loves you emotionally and you are a priority for her. You want to be married to someone who loves you more that you love her. Trust me this is important when you have problems in your marriage.

2) She financially well to do based on her career as well as her family supporting her. She also knows how to manage finances well. This is key in every marriage and can help a marriage survive. You don't have to worry about finances like a lot of people do.

3) Based on your story, she will look after you when you are down with illness or bad times etc.... This is often hard to find , when bad times come, a lot of people run away. So finding such a person is important.

All these might not seem important now, but are key to married life that will lives forever.

The bad point about her :

1) She has low sex drive and not able to satisfy you.

2) You have disagreements on certain things and viewpoints. She is forceful to say her view is right.

So here is my logical practical thinking advice ( not necessarily moral according to society, but what gives society the right to judge anyone?):

1) For the bad points : Low sex drive, based on what you mention, she had never had sex, so after marriage, and her 1st taste of sex, she might actually change. BUT in case she doesn't, my advice to you is to outsource for the things you can't have. Not to cheat her with another woman ( this is emotional cheating and most woman cannot forgive), but to relieve your urges there are many places you can relieve your sexual urges.

Why do I say this? because over time, as you grow older , your urges will go down or your mind will be more powerful than your urges and thus be able to control it.

I think losing a good woman whom you LOVE just for lack of sex drive is a bad decision which will impact you for life. You might regret later.

Its very hard to find someone you truly LOVE. you can like a person, you can have a companionship but to find a person you truly LOVE is hard and when you do find the person, you should not let go.

You find a workaround for the bad points and the workaround for low sex urge is to outsource.

2) For the disagreements - This happens in every relationship, you just need to sit down and work out a solution for this. Disagreements come out for many reasons, most of times because of ego , pride etc....

Based on what I read about your girl, she seems to feel you are hard to trust based on your past. If you make her trust you, she might actually change quite a bit and you might have more freedom as you put it. =)

If you TRULY LOVE her with all your heart , then the sex drive and disagreement should not matter.

However, if you intending to marry just because you are getting old and you have been with her for so many years, or she has money etc... its the road to disaster. =)

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Thanks for your thoughtful input. Appreciate it.

I agree with you that priorities will change in life at different stages.

I can just hope that once we have settled down and started making more money and traveling around the world, she will also start to be not so tensed up and enjoy doing activities with me.

But you are right that I love her because she is not like other girls. She is not materialistic, not bitchy and shares the same worldview with me which I really love and I think it's hard to find.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Hmmm, Ts, have you ever stop and wonder if its you who does not interest her in Sex?

Am sure you have come across many women who engage in sex freely in your encounter in workplace, social circle or even study course. Women nowadays are more empowered because of better education, better access to information and have better financial rewards in their workplace. Thus, you must have seen and know many who does not see herself as a weaker party when it comes to sex.

My point will be TS has to be extra careful in his relationship as he tried to protray his gf as the alpha in the relationship. If you accept the current lifestyle, then in the future don't be sad in anything crops up. Sex is not the only fuel in a couple's life but its a good fuel. But if you let sex run the show in your couple's life then it will soon turn into a nightmare for you too.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

Never had sex before. Not even with any girl. I don't know if it's just me that she doesn't want but I think I will give us more time now.

There were girls I know who actually flirted me, but I think I'm stupid or something I never went further. Once a next-class college mate whom I wasn't really close with, actually invited me to her apartment, alone. Then today I had this colleague msg me "miss u..." And ask me to look for her in her town next time as she is moving...

LOL. I think I have the "tu hua yun" but so far I only dedicate my life to my gf... Although I'm damn horny it's really a wonder how I kept my didi in my pants for so long.

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You
 

U still virgin ah? That explains lah...
I know what medicine can cure you liao.
:D

Re: 40+ Single Men... Question For You