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Re: 16 Again
"Another rejection?"
"She fell in love with another guy. Why does she spend so much time talking to me, but drop everything when he comes along?"
"I don't have any answer, bro. Even now."
"Am I being too much of a wimp? Should I have told her how I felt?"
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I've realized my problem when I was interviewing someone for a sales position in my company.
Sweet girl, very friendly, just the type of mix of looks, body and personality for me. When she appeared for the interview after two others before her, she was like a breath of fresh air.
She was bright and sunny, she had that kind of sweet dimpled smile that reminded me of the countless heartaches I have had when I was younger, and the kind of figure that I lusted after in my private escpades into the Japanese porn world each night.
I found myself in a position of authority across physical and mental desire, and I lost it.
I was trying very hard to listen to her talk about her achievements, and I probably heard most of what she was saying, but I couldn't concentrate. I could barely breathe in her presence and when I did, I got a sense of her sweet fragrance from where I sat, not 2 metres from her.
The interview was over in what seemed like forever . I knew that she passed with flying colors in everything that we were looking for. In fact, she did so with flying colors.
But I was torn.
I was facing a real danger to my marriage. Can I work in close quarters with her without being affected by what I was feeling?
If she had offered to have sex with me for favors in my company there and then, a stranger I just met not ten minutes ago, I would have gladly taken it. Might I remind you that I am married , with my love and with a beautiful child? And there and then, I was ready to throw it all away for someone I barely knew?
Anyway, she didn't take up the job, which was for the better, I guess. But that was the first time I scared myself, and also when I realised the depth of my weakness.
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